Who Wins Super Bowl XLIX? Satan or Hitler?

Cheater vs. Cheater

Cheater vs. Cheater

This is all written with tongue firmly in cheek.   Am I really comparing two NFL coaches with an insane Nazi and the Prince of Darkness?   No, I am not, so unclench. 

We’re standing on the verge of Super Bowl 49 as the defending champion Seattle Seahawks take on the New England Patriots and because these sort of things are always reduced to a chess match between the coaches, it’s one lyin, cheatin’ ass coach in Billy Belichick against another lyin’ cheatin’ ass coach in Petey Carroll.

The game is billed as Patriots vs. Seahawks,  but when both sides are full of assholes you can stand it more like ISIS vs Al Qaeda,  explosive diarrhea vs inflamed hemorrhoids.  This is a battle between  Satan vs. Hitler because they’re both evil.  One is just more evil.   If only there were a way both of them could lose in a 0-0 tie after four overtimes that would be okay by me..   Mostly I’ll be happy if the Seawhores ram an inflated football up the ass of the Patsies.

As a 49ers fan I have no rooting interest for either side.   As a 49ers fan I already hate the fucking Seawhores,   As a 49ers fan its blasphemy to pull for the Seawhores.   As a 49ers fan, I’ve seen Russell Wilson rip apart the secondary, Mumbling Marshawn Lynch run around, over and through the D-line, and watched helplessly as Richard Sherman made All-Pro based on lighting up Colin Kaepernick.   As a 49ers fan, I hate fucking Seawhores because they absolute own the 49ers.

But I hate the fucking Patriots more.

 

Everything wrong with the NFL is what’s wrong with the Patriots.  The head coach is a cheater.   The quarterback is a whiner and a cheater.    Now I’m not saying Belichick is in league with Satan, but if Satan is pulling for anybody in the Super Bowl, it has to be the Patriots.   If the Seven Deadly Sins are Lust, Gluttony, Greed, Sloth, Wrath, Envy and Pride, I can make a case the Patriots are guilty of at least five of them.

This doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty of reasons to despise the sight of Petey Carroll including being a 9/11 Truther (possibly) as well as leaving as head coach at the University of Southern California to take over the Seahags just before the school got busted by the NCAA for rules violations (definitely).   The kids he left at USC got stuck with the sanctions while Carroll cashed big checks from Seawhores owner Paul Allen.

Am we evil? Yes, we are!

Carroll ethical lapses and questionable character make it hard to pull for him, but the repeated way the Patsies flip the bird at the entire NFL with their persistent insistence the rules do not apply to them the way it does to the rest of the NFL makes it impossible to pull for them.   The Homeless Guy in the Hoodie must have “if you ain’t cheatin’ you ain’t tryin’ on his scrotum and that’s enough to make me cheer for the Dallas Cowboys and I hate the stinking’ Dallas Cowboys.

Given the choice between Hitler Pete and Satan Bill, I’m gonna reluctantly roll with the dictator and hope like hell Belicheat, Lady Brady and the Patsies take the “L” today.   A humiliating loss would be good.  A vicious blowout would be better.

Seawhores: 24 – Patsies:  17

“Are You Ready For Some Hitler?”

"Yeee Haaaaa! Wanna hear what I think about Obama's jobs plan?"

When you’re comparing the President of the United States to Adolf Hitler and you’ve got a deal with a major television network, there’s no way that’s gonna end well for you.

Add in that you’re an aging honky tonk country singer living off your daddy’s legacy and one hit song and it only gets even more ridiculous.

BRISTOL, Conn. (AP) — ESPN pulled Hank Williams Jr.’s classic intro song from its broadcast of Monday night’s NFL game after the country singer famous for the line “Are you ready for some football?” used an analogy to Adolf Hitler in discussing President Barack Obama.

In an interview Monday morning on Fox News’ “Fox & Friends,” Williams, unprompted, said of Obama’s outing on the links with House Speaker John Boehner: “It’d be like Hitler playing golf with (Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin) Netanyahu.”

Asked to clarify, Williams said, “They’re the enemy,” adding that by “they” he meant Obama and Vice President Joe Biden.

Anchor Gretchen Carlson later said to him, “You used the name of one of the most hated people in all of the world to describe, I think, the president.” Williams replied, “Well, that is true. But I’m telling you like it is.”

“While Hank Williams Jr. is not an ESPN employee, we recognize that he is closely linked to our company through the open to ‘Monday Night Football,”‘ the network said in a statement. “We are extremely disappointed with his comments, and as a result we have decided to pull the open from tonight’s telecast.”

Williams released a statement through his publicist, saying: “Some of us have strong opinions and are often misunderstood. My analogy was extreme – but it was to make a point. I was simply trying to explain how stupid it seemed to me – how ludicrous that pairing was. They’re polar opposites and it made no sense. They don’t see eye-to-eye and never will. I have always respected the office of the president.”

ESPN did not say whether the intro, synonymous with “Monday Night Football” since 1989, would be used again after this week’s Colts- Buccaneers game.

Personally, I could care less what Hank Williams, Jr’s politics are. I watch Monday Night Football for the football and not some country singer’s asinine opinions. Sing the damn song, cash the check and stay out of my face with your weak Hitler analogies.

This redneck knows just enough about politics to be informed, but not enough to know what the hell he’s talking about.   His interview on Fox and Friends proves a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

Williams Jr., has been singing that opening for Monday Night Football since 1989.  He’s as much a part of the show as Andy Rooney was for 60 Minutes.  The difference being Rooney got paid to give his opinions (and be a professional curmudgeon) and Williams is paid to wear sunglasses and lip synch to an overcaffinated remix of “All My Rowdy Friends Are Coming Over Tonight.”

He’s being paid by ESPN/Disney to be a lovable good ol’ boy.  When he expresses an asinine opinion on Fox that’s so extreme even Gretchen Carlson has to call him on it, he’s making himself a figure of controversy and that’s not what he’s being paid for by The Mouse House.

Nobody gives a sweet shit what Hank Williams Jr. thinks.  About anything.   He cashes ESPN’s checks and they get the right to suspend his ass when he says dumb stuff.  I’m not seeing the problem here.

I know nothing about contemporary country music and who’s hot and who’s not, but my guess is MNF is the best gig Hank Jr. has going for him so he’d be a damn fool to blow it because he wants to make silly comparisons between Barack Obama and Der Fuhrer.

Or as Frank Zappa would say, “Shut up and play yer guitar.”

ESPN will probably bench him for a week until the brouhaha blows over and he’ll back with all his rowdy friends.

I just watch the game.  I don’t even hear the song anymore.

It’s still better though than Faith Hill desecrating Joan Jett’s “I Love Rock and Roll.”

MSNBC ignores Pat Buchanan’s Hitler mancrush

Pat Buchanan: so Far-Right hes wrong.

Pat Buchanan: so Far-Right he's wrong.

Make a deal with the devil and you don’t change the devil.  The devil changes you.

But what if you’re someone who admires Adolf Hitler, the closest thing the world has ever seen to the devil in the flesh?

What if you actually wrote a column that suggests Poland started World War II and Hitler not only wanted peace, he didn’t even want to invade Russia.

You’d probably be Patrick J. Buchanan.

If Hitler wanted the world, why did he not build strategic bombers, instead of two-engine Dorniers and Heinkels that could not even reach Britain from Germany?

Why did he let the British army go at Dunkirk?

Why did he offer the British peace, twice, after Poland fell, and again after France fell?

Why, when Paris fell, did Hitler not demand the French fleet, as the Allies demanded and got the Kaiser’s fleet? Why did he not demand bases in French-controlled Syria to attack Suez? Why did he beg Benito Mussolini not to attack Greece?

Because Hitler wanted to end the war in 1940, almost two years before the trains began to roll to the camps.

~ Patrick J. Buchanan,  9-1-2009

MSNBC carried Buchanan’s column on their website  but removed it when a Jewish Democratic activist published an article on The Huffington Post  about Buchanan’s  pro-Hitler sentiments

In response to a query from Politico.com, a MSNBC spokesman said, “An editorial decision was made to remove the column from msnbc.com. Pat is a contributor to MSNBC, his syndicated column does not speak for the network or represent the views of MSNBC.”

MSNBC may rightly be embarrassed by  Buchanan’s blog entry where he defends Adolf Hitler, but they have no one but themselves to blame.   It doesn’t take a background check by a private investigator to find evidence of Buchanan’s sympathy for the Fuhrer.   All it takes is a Google search.

The Anti-Defamation League has complied entire pages devoted to Buchanan’s bigotry including his  Hitler crush such as this gushing bit of revisionism:   “Those of us in childhood during the war years were introduced to Hitler only as a caricature…Though Hitler was indeed racist and anti-Semitic to the core, a man who without compunction could commit murder and genocide, he was also an individual of great courage, a soldier’s soldier in the Great War, a leader steeped in the history of Europe, who possessed oratorical powers that could awe even those who despised him. But Hitler’s success was not based on his extraordinary gifts alone. His genius was an intuitive sense of the mushiness, the character flaws, the weakness masquerading as morality that was in the hearts of the statesmen who stood in his path.”

St. Louis Globe – Democrat, Aug 25, 1977

What’s the difference between Buchanan praising Hitler as “individual of great courage” possessing both “extraordinary gifts” and “genius” and MSNBC giving him a national platform and Louis Farrakhan calling the Fuhrer “wickedly great?”   Is it that Farrakhan is a reviled figure by the good ol’ boy mainstream media while Buchanan  is regarded as a kindred spirit who occasionally says off-the-wall things about Nazis?

But MSNBC, the supposed left-wing alternative to Fox News, doesn’t seem to care about Buchanan’s history of making inflammatory remarks defending Hitler, denigrating homosexuals, demonizing feminists and degrading minorities.   He’s “Uncle Pat” who plays the role of the crotchety curmudgeon for Rachel Maddow so she can shake her head sadly over how backwards and bigoted he is.

Buchanan is older, but he hasn’t mellowed with age like a fine wine.  If anything he’s become even more of a bitter old bigot, homophobe and anti-Semitic than he was.   As recently as June  Buchanan and Maddow argued over his opposition to affirmative action and Judge Sonia Sotomayor’s nomination to the Supreme Court.   Even Maddow had wearied of Buchanan’s White supremacy rap, but she shouldn’t have been so naive.  As recently as March 2008 Buchanan  had reacted to Barack Obama’s speech about race and ranted where was the gratitude from Blacks for all White Americans had done for them?

…America has been the best country on earth for black folks. It was here that 600,000 black people, brought from Africa in slave ships, grew into a community of 40 million, were introduced to Christian salvation, and reached the greatest levels of freedom and prosperity blacks have ever known.

(Jeremiah) Wright ought to go down on his knees and thank God he is an American.

Second, no people anywhere has done more to lift up blacks than white Americans. Untold trillions have been spent since the ’60s on welfare, food stamps, rent supplements, Section 8 housing, Pell grants, student loans, legal services, Medicaid, Earned Income Tax Credits and poverty programs designed to bring the African-American community into the mainstream.

Governments, businesses and colleges have engaged in discrimination against white folks — with affirmative action, contract set-asides and quotas — to advance black applicants over white applicants.

Churches, foundations, civic groups, schools and individuals all over America have donated time and money to support soup kitchens, adult education, day care, retirement and nursing homes for blacks.

We hear the grievances. Where is the gratitude?

Buchanan conveniently forgets if White Americans hadn’t set sail to enslave Black Africans in the first place, their damned “Christian salvation” wouldn’t have been necessary.

MSNBC ignored Buchanan's bigotry, but now tries to play dumb.

MSNBC needs to go further than merely removing Buchanan’s columns from their website.   He should be removed from their employment.

And why not?  What has Pat Buchanan done to justify his prominence as a political commentator?   He last job in government was 22 years ago as Ronald Reagan’s Communications Director from 1985 to 1987.   He ran for president three times, failed three times and succeeded only in solidifying the image of the Republican Party as captive to the extreme right-wing with his 1992 “culture war”  speech to the Republican National Convention.

Apparently, MSNBC thinks this perennial loser gives the perennial third place cable news network some small degree of stature.

MSNBC has given this Hitler groupie a forum for his hatred for far too long.  If  the  insufferably sanctimonious Keith Olbermann needs a worthy candidate he should nominate  Buchanan as a lifetime member of his “Worst Person in the World” list.