Cliven Bundy Has A Negro Problem

American Idiot.

I admit it wasn’t until the last 48 hours that I paid any attention to the strange saga of Nevada cattle rancher, anti-government zealot, and Fox News folk hero Cliven Bundy and his battle with the Bureau of Land Management over the $1 million he owes the federal government and us in his refusal to pay grazing fees.

Nothing new about White men who don’t believe they have to pay for what’s not theirs and should be able to do what they please. Nothing new about anti-government zealots who speak plainly and find they quickly can be transformed from strange cranks to a just cause for militia groups and talk radio listeners.

Nothing new about someone like Bundy who invokes sympathy one day and scorn the next when he opens his mouth and the ignorance comes flying out. Enjoy his time in the spotlight due to the stand-off with the government, Bundy has taken to holding daily press conferences where he can share his wisdom on many topics.

For example, America’s Negro Problem.

“I want to tell you one more thing I know about the Negro,” Bundy said recalling driving past a public-housing project in North Las Vegas, “and in front of that government house the door was usually open and the older people and the kids — and there is always at least a half a dozen people sitting on the porch — they didn’t have nothing to do. They didn’t have nothing for their kids to do. They didn’t have nothing for their young girls to do.

“And because they were basically on government subsidy, so now what do they do? They abort their young children, they put their young men in jail, because they never learned how to pick cotton. And I’ve often wondered, are they better off as slaves, picking cotton and having a family life and doing things, or are they better off under government subsidy? They didn’t get no more freedom. They got less freedom.”

That sound you hear is the collective “D’OH!” coming from every floor of the Fox News Channel headquarters. And it just keeps getting worse.  Or better depending on your politics.

Free room and board, full employment, and happy slaves. Yep. Those were the days.

Because.
Bundy.
Just.
Won’t.
Shut.
Up.

“I’m wondering if they’re better off under a government subsidy and their young women are having the abortions and their young men are in jail and their older women and children are sitting out on the cement porch without nothing to do.

I’m wondering: Are they happier now under this government subsidy system than they were when they were when they were slaves and they was able to their family structure together and the chickens and the garden and the people have something to do?

So in my mind, are they better off being slaves in that sense or better off being slaves to the United States government in the sense of the subsidy? I’m wondering. The statement was right. I am wondering.”

Al Bundy

“Please don’t be related to me!”

I’m wondering too. Wondering how fast Sean Hannity, Rand Paul and the rest of the “we’re not racist, we just hang out with racists” right-wing pack will scurry away like scalded dogs from the latest stupidity to spill from this shitkicker’s pie hole?

For the losers, extremists and anti-government nihilists who side with a racist nut like Bundy they are receiving a harsh reminder of the danger of wrapping your arms around an extremist.  Now because Bundy is a raving racist asshole doesn’t mean those defending him are raving racist assholes themselves.   However, it does indicate their comfort level with raving racists assholes. As my friend Pittsburgh Post-Gazette columnist Tony Norman tweeted, “Lie down with Bundy-sized dogs and get up with Bundy-sized fleas.”

Like a crash between a bus and a train the sight and sound of an ignorant man with no sense of how ignorant he really is and no inner filter to couch his bigotry in more mainstream language, Bundy is a horrible to behold, but fascinating in how blissfully he plows on without a care in the world.   Bundy has probably always referred to Blacks as “Negroes” in public and likely far worse in private.

For him, this is probably as politically correct as it gets.

“Hey , here comes Mr. Bundy. Everybody look busy!”

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A Liberal In the Right-Wing Lion’s Den

Jesse Lee Peterson: on a mission to out-right wing the Whitest right-winger.

When I went on The Jesse Lee Peterson radio show, the last thing I was expecting was anything remotely resembling an intelligent and reasoned debate.   I knew I would try to  hold up my end, but I had no illusions Peterson, an ardent right-winger and frequent guest on Sean Hannity “let’s bash Obama” television show would do his part.   Conservative talk radio thrives on conflict instead of consensus and ranting at each other instead of reasoning together.

Peterson, an Atlanta-based preacher and right-wing radio host made his dubious claim to fame by saying crazy crap like, “Barack Obama hates White people, especially White men” and “A majority of Whites supported Obama to prove that they’re not racists.   And ninety-six percent of Blacks voted for him because of his race.   More and more Americans, both Black and White are beginning to realize the truth about Obama’s massive welfare plan and his desire to punish the producers in this country.  People are feeling let down by the “Messiah’ and regret voting for this supremely corrupt individual.”

Jesse Lee also says if White folks ever leave the United States and leave it to Blacks to run the country, “they would turn America into a ghetto within ten years.”    He also has thanked Whites for slavery and compared conditions on slave ships to “being on a crowded airplane.”   Peterson is regurgitating the  same old right-wing revisionist bullshit, but this time  in Blackface, but he’s got the microphone, not me.   Smooching White conservative ass has its benefits.

I was invited to appear on the morning radio show following my Sarah Palin article on The Root.   I didn’t expect to be challenged by the host or his callers and I wasn’t.   It was more like a series of jabbing and feinting as we circled around the issues throwing out  talking points.   I’ve done radio and television shows many times over the years and been attacked from the Left as a sell-out “Sambo,” so being ripped from the Right is nothing new.

Jesse Lee and I rapped for a while about the article with him blowing big sloppy kisses to the favorite MILF’s of the middle-aged conservative male, Palin and fellow nutcase, Michelle Bachmann.   What is it about these guys?   Do they need to update their porn collections or what?   I was expecting to spend no more than 15 minutes or so, but I ended up doing the entire hour.  He opened up the phones to the listeners and I sparred with three callers.   The first was more interested in yapping about how the media is trying to silence conservatives (zzzzzzz) and calling me a “piranha” who how I was “feeding on the blood and flesh of conservatives.”

I prefer a ham-and-cheese omelet from IHOP in the morning  to  chunks of bloody conservative flesh, but I wasn’t taking this seriously anyway, so I shrugged it off.   You have to respect someone to be offended by them and this goof was only interested in the sound of his own voice.   He certainly wasn’t interested in anything I had to say.

Brown shoes don't make it.

The next caller was at least polite enough to make his point and allow me to respond.   It was the last caller who almost pissed me off.   He hadn’t read the article.  All he needed to know was I was an eeeeeeevil liberal who was out to destroy America.    I don’t mind a radio show’s callers disagreeing with me.   I know I’m a visitor to his house and I’ve got to deal with his rules.

What I don’t like is some punk calling up and because there are thousands of miles between you and them, grows a pair and talks shit.    “Paul” said I was a “coward” who “ought to be ashamed for trying to lead Black people back into slavery.”  He went off about how Democrats have never done anything good for this country and were the party of racists.    Like every Black conservative who goes on that “racist Democrat” tirade, Paul fell back on listing a few Southern crackers (George Wallace, Bull Connor, Lester Maddox) who each and every one of them were long dead, buried, worm droppings.   Can’t these guys update the list to include a Democrat who hasn’t been dead for 20 years?

A battle of wits with a guy shooting blanks is boring,  so Jesse Lee asked me if I agreed with Evil Dick Cheney’s prediction that Obama would be a one-term president.    I replied how I agreed with Colin Powell when he said about Obama, “we elected a man, not a superman” and how Evil Dick  had been America’s worst vice-president who should have been indicted as a war criminal.

Two can play that “throw ’em some red meat and watch ’em come running ” game.   Jesse Lee went off on how Powell was a traitor to the Republican Party by supporting Obama over John McCain and how he had only voted for Obama because he was Black.   That argument never made sense because the flip side to it is even if Blacks did vote for Obama out of misguided race loyalty, the same  holds true for Whites voting for McCain, but you hear it all the time.

Before we could dialogue further,  the show ended abruptly without so much as a “thanks for coming on”  Jesse Lee had probably run too long or too close to the top of the hour break.  I wasn’t sweating it.  He had treated me fine, pronounced my last name right and allowed me to plug my website (though there has been a disappointing lack of hate mail).   Maybe Paul hasn’t learned how to write?   I hadn’t done anything to embarrass myself.  At least anything more embarrassing than having done the show in the first place.

I did tell Jesse Lee one bald-faced lie.   I said I’d be glad to do his show .   He immediately asked me to come back the next morning to discuss “the Messiah’s” State of the Union address.   Turning down the invitation wasn’t hard.  Whatever minimal entertainment value I had hoped to get from the experience fell far short of my meager expectations.    The show’s  producer sent me an e-mail and blew up my cell with a message  gushing  how Jesse Lee had appreciated me standing up for my tin foil hat, far out,  America hating, Obama loving socialist principles.   How would I like to be on the show again?

Um….No.   I wasn’t expecting Meet the Press, but I had rolled out of bed, done the show in my bathrobe and defended myself from a few grumpy conservatives.   It wasn’t much fun and it certainly wasn’t any sort of intellectual challenge.   .

Talking to Jesse Lee Peterson and the three stooges that make up his audience was like getting a bad blow job:  an experience worth remembering, but not worth repeating.