“Batman v. Superman” Shows (and Tells) Too Much

Super Stink Face

Super Stink Face

The new and (hopefully last!) trailer for  Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice has dropped and it indicate the first sign of the glaring absence of executive producer Christopher Nolan to tell writer David S. Goyer and director Zack Snyder, “I wouldn’t do that if I were for you”.  In Man of Steel, Nolan resisted their idea for Superman to kill Zod and the Dynamic Duo him it would be cool (it wasn’t).

Now with the adult out of the room, who’s gonna tell the kids they can’t eat pizza for breakfast and to flush after using the john?

Let’s sum up the trailer:

Batman is mad at Superman. Superman doesn’t give a shit about Batman being mad. Bruce and Clark have a snark fest. Lex Zuckerberg does a bad Joker riff. Previous scenes from earlier trailers. Bats and Supes duke it out. IT’S A BRO FIGHT! Mark Luthor unleashes his eeeeeeeevil scheme with Zod’s cold dead body. Doomsday is here looking like a moving pile of puke and poop. Bats and Supes team up to fight the greater menace. Mass destruction and big explosions. Suddenly, Whatta Woman appears! Bats and Supes exchange puzzled looks. “Is she with you, dude?” We Stand As One to Kick Doomsday’s nasty ass!


I save $10 bucks! This might be the worst trailer since Castaway in giving away all its big moments way too soon.  I’m certain there are more than a few secrets left to reveal in Batman v. Superman, but Great Scott that trailer was spoileriffic.

And it still looks to me like passing over Bryan Cranston in favor of Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luthor was a turrrible idea as Charles Barkley might say.   It’s completely out of place and character for a DC flick since they disdain being “jokey” like Marvel movies. I didn’t mind the exchange as much as I agree it’s a little tone-deaf after the laugh riots of Nolan’s Batman trilogy and Man of Steel.
The thing which bugs me most about this trailer isn’t Batman or Superman or Wonder Woman or even Doomsday.  Okay, I’m lying a bit  because  Doomsday looks like shit and he’s never been anything but DC’s knockoff version of Hulk Lite so Superman has someone he can hit that won’t splatter from the punch.

It’s Jesse Eisenberg’s goofy Lex Luthor because nothing screams “BEWARE, MY WRATH!” like an angry Jesse Eisenberg!

Look, no knock on Eisenberg as an actor. Loved him as anti-social, unlikable The Social Network, but his Luther looks like the same smart-ass motormouth he played in Now You See Me. In fact, I’ll go further. Between Gene Hackman, Kevin Spacey and now Eisenberg, the best actor to play Lex Luthor was…Clancy Brown.

My brother tells me I’m being a buzzkill and the trailer doesn’t spoil everything about Batman v. Superman.  We still haven’t seen Aquaman, but that’s a pretty thin branch to perch on.  If you’re depending on Aquaman to save your movie, it’s a lost cause already.

jesse-eisenberg-lex-luthor-not-bryan-cranston-meme2016 is going to be a huge year in super hero films with Batman v. Superman,  Captain America: Civil War, X-Men: Apocalypse, Suicide Squad,  and maybe one film where superheroes aren’t beating up each other, Deadpool.

Every genre reaches a point of saturation and if super hero movies aren’t there yet, they are getting close.   When the heroes are beating up each other it’s a sign they are running out of villains to beat up instead.

It’s going to be a big year, but to make it a good year, something is going to have to grab my interest in a way Avengers: Age of Ultron (saw it once and promptly forgot all about it) and Ant-Man (didn’t bother to see it) did not.   Maybe I’ve aged out of getting excited about seeing comic book characters on the big screen or maybe I’m just waiting for one that actually gives me a reason to get excited.

Fake is the New Real: 2010 in review

The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:

Healthy blog!

The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads Wow.

Crunchy numbers

Featured image

The Louvre Museum has 8.5 million visitors per year. This blog was viewed about 180,000 times in 2010. If it were an exhibit at The Louvre Museum, it would take 8 days for that many people to see it.

In 2010, there were 168 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 391 posts. There were 395 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 40mb. That’s about 1 pictures per day.

The busiest day of the year was July 2nd with 7,056 views. The most popular post that day was Rebooting Wonder Woman: More Retro than Revolutionary..

Where did they come from?

The top referring sites in 2010 were wordpress.com, facebook.com, field-negro.blogspot.com, napiszar.com, and WordPress Dashboard.

Some visitors came searching, mostly for coco, sarah palin, rape, coco ice t, and pam grier.

Attractions in 2010

These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.


Rebooting Wonder Woman: More Retro than Revolutionary. July 2010
174 comments and 116 Likes on WordPress.com


Coco: The 8th Wonder of the World? November 2009


I’m sick of “celebrities.” Get me out of here! June 2009


Hey Kids! Sex, violence and comic books! April 2009


Has porn made rape a spectator sport? November 2009

If  I take this report from Word Press to heart, I guess I should ditch writing about politics, national and world events, sports, entertainment and whatever else goes on in my boring little life to write about porn, comic books and psuedo-celebrities.

How depressing is that?

What a warm, wonderful thing it is to know it’s not insights or caustic commentary or opinion most of the visitors to this blog want.  It’s rape, comic books and a blonde bimbo with an inflated rack and ass.

Wonder Woman changes her stupid costume and that is what gets 174 comments?   Jesus Frigging Christ.  😦    You’re not exactly inspiring me here, folks.

Well, at least I know now how much I’m spinning my wheels.   Got to give the people what they want.


Sex: easy to sell and good for the stats.

Rebooting Wonder Woman: More Retro than Revolutionary.

Wonder Woman has had several costume changes over the years...

Did you hear the big news?  After almost 70 years, Wonder Woman is getting an extreme makeover.   She’s cutting her hair short, trading in her magic lasso for a basketball,  giving up the Justice League for the WNBA and trying out as a shooting guard.   Okay, so she’s not doing any of those things, but that would still be more interesting to me than her changing her look by turning into a biker chick in a leather jacket and pants.

Now this wasn’t a subject I was even slightly interested in until I realized the announcement of the distaff member of the DC Comics holy trinity (Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman) was being wheeled out for public consumption following an extreme makeover.   For reasons I’m not sure of this became a MAJOR story for the mainstream media from The Washington Post, Entertainment Weekly, The BBC, MTV, CNN, Fox News, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution and more cable channels, newspapers, websites and blogs than you can throw a magic lasso around.   I’m always amused when the non-comic book press gets a whiff of of a comic book “event” and goes batshit crazy about it, so I figured I might as well join in on the fun.    Unlike most of the writers penning these articles, I’ve actually read a Wonder Woman comic book within the past decade.

Still, to paraphrase Public Enemy, Wonder Woman was a hero to most, but she never meant shit to me.

Wonder Woman is one of the oldest comic book characters and one of the all-time dullest and most overrated.  DC has tried and tried and tried again to raise WW to the level of Bats and Supes.  They’ve tried radical changes in story and art.  They’ve hired superstar talent, gay talent, women talent and the result—nothing.   After almost seven decades there still has never been a definitive version of the character and there’s no reason to believe anything is about to change now.    Will there be an initial surge in sales of the relaunched comic book?  Of course there will be after all this free publicity, but after it fades away (and fade away it will), Wonder Woman will sink back to its middling  monthly ales numbers in the 70,000 – 80,000 range.

In 2008, Alicia Ashby wrote a pretty well thought out essay of  “The 10 Reasons Nobody Cares About Wonder Woman.”   Among Ashby’s reasons were “There Are No Great Wonder Woman Stories” and compared her lackluster run of stories to her super friends Batman (The Dark Knight, The Killing Joke, Arkham Asylum) and Superman (Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow, Red Sun),  “Terrible Villans,” “The Invisible Plane” and the prescient “Madame, Please Put On Some Pants.”

Comic books are a male-dominated, testosterone fueled medium.  Guys grow up wanting to BE Superman, Batman, Spider-Man and Captain America.    Wonder Woman is eye-candy and the hot chick they fantasize about.  First, last and always.    The small percentage of women and girls that read Wonder Woman hardly make up for the large percentage of men and boys who don’t.

You want to make Wonder Woman edgy?  You really want to smash her tired status quo to pieces and give her not a ticky-tacky reboot but a major kick in the ass?    Have her come out of the comic book closet.   When you think about it, why wouldn’t Wonder Woman be a lesbian?   She’s an Amazon who comes from an island entirely populated by women.   But that’s too edgy for DC.  They would rather screw around on the edges and change her uniform and stay as far away as possible from her sexual orientation.  Ooh, aren’t we pushing the envelope? Aren’t we just shaking Wonder Woman’s world down to its foundations? No.  You’re really not.

...and this is not one of her better ones.

If I were part of DC’s PR department, I’d be high-fiving all around because they got the mainstream media to mention Wonder Woman, but this falls under the category of a dull week where everyone is bored with the Kagan confirmation hearings and the oil spill.  “Wonder Woman puts pants on” is the embodiment of a NOTHING story.   It means nothing.  It changes nothing.  At the end of the day, who gives a shit?   If  you’ve ever read comic books more than a year you KNOW it’s inevitable she ends up right back in the classic duds same as Spider-Man’s black  costume and Electric-Blue Superman did.

A comic book character changes from a highly impractical uniform to a slightly more practical uniform and the next thing you know the media starts wetting themselves.  Whoopie-ding-dong.  Must be a slow week for news.  54 people got shot over one weekend in Chicago recently including two kids who went to a barbecue and ended being chased, stripped naked, shot execution-style in the head, and their bodies left on the railroad tracks.  Didn’t see any big national media focus about that and I damn sure didn’t see any Wonder Woman fly in with her invisible plane to save the day.

New Coke got a lot of publicity too.  Doesn’t mean it was a good idea.

The best rendition of Wonder Woman is and was the Lynda Carter version—and she wore the one-piece.   Even then the character of Steve Trevor was introduced only to give Wonder Woman someone to rescue every week and give her a little heterosexual cover.    The woman is almost 70 years old.  Isn’t it about time she finally chose a side?   Drag her out the closet and let  her start singing Melissa Etheridge and Indigo Girls songs.

Let Wonder Woman be Wonder Woman and develop into something more than Good Girl Art.   By now haven’t we reached a point where we can handle open major comic book character that is a lesbian or gay?    Just because she’s playing for the other team doesn’t mean she still isn’t on our side.

The Mighty Glutes of Wonder White Woman

Sarah Palin Ain’t No Wonder Woman (or Ronald Reagan either).

"Why so serious? I sure ain't."

It is finally coming into focus what it is about Sarah Palin  has that Barack Obama does not and it has those who attended the first Tea Party convention in Nashville eating out the palm of her hand.  At least the one she doesn’t scribble notes on.

He’s Black and he’s smart.  She’s White and she’s not.

Which is what makes the Tea Party and Palin go together like salt and nuts.   They have gravitated to each other which is odd considering a group that distrusts politicians and the “liberal” media have both swooned over an ambitious and driven politician who loves the media spotlight.

It’s equally amazing to watch to the Palin groupies rally to her side against any slight to her, real or imagined.

The conservative cliché has become, “Oh, she’s just a private citizen. Stop hatin’ on Sarah. Why are you Lefties so obsessed with her?”

Let’s dispense with this nonsense. She’s a former candidate for vice-president who was chosen by her ancient running mate for two reasons: One: Her impeccable right-wing credentials and Two: her MILF factor. What else is there?  It’s certainly not based upon her impressive command of domestic and foreign policy issues.

Palin quit her post as the chief executive of Alaska to move down to the lower 48, go on a rock star tour to shill her ghost-written book, joined Fox News as a “commentator” and pocketed $100,000 to give the keynote speech to a nascent political organization to burnish her own obvious run for the presidency in 2012.

Now what about that is not newsworthy? There are only two–count ’em–TWO charismatic personalities in the conservative camp right now.

Limbaugh is one and Palin is 1a. Everyone else is either a politician or a bureaucrat. Palin and Limbaugh by the power of their personalities are the only fire starters the Right has right now. They don’t just galvanize the Left to attack them. They galvanize the Right to defend them. Others personalities may emerge within the next two years, but right now, they’re it.

Palin IS a rank hypocrite when within the space of days she blasts Rahm Emanuel for his politically incorrect speech, and then clumsily turns around and says it’s not the same thing when Rush Limbaugh calls someone a “retard.” If it’s wrong when Rahm says it, why is it right when Rush says it too?

It’s also dumb to one minute jab at Obama in your speech at the Tea Party convention saying, “This is about the people and it’s bigger than any king or queen of a tea party and it’s a lot bigger than any charismatic guy with a teleprompter.”

Right before she checks her crib notes for talking points.

It’s her right as an American citizen to run for whatever office her ambition; ego and handlers tell her to go for. Just don’t feed me this trash that it’s a fatal attraction of the Left with Palin that keeps her in the news.  She has her own obsession with celebrity, cash and power that keeps her chugging along just fine.

It seems to be infectious.  David Broder, the personification of the embedded Washington columnist who gave up insight for access, lavished wet, sloppy kisses over Palin’s performance saying, “This was not the first time that Palin has impressed me. I gave her high marks for her vice presidential acceptance speech in St. Paul…There are times when the American people are looking for something more: for an Eisenhower, who liberated Europe; an FDR or a Kennedy or a Bush, all unashamed aristocrats; or an Obama, with eloquence and brains.”

“But in the present mood of the country, Palin is by all odds a threat to the more uptight Republican aspirants such as Mitt Romney and Tim Pawlenty — and potentially, to Obama as well,” Broder wrote.

Far be it from me to disagree with the so-called Dean of Washington journalists, but I’m far less impressed by Palin than he is.   It’s easy in the cold and snow of February 2010 to postulate that the Power of Palin will bulldoze any and all Republican challengers in 2012 and then Obama, but Broder doesn’t seem to get that just like Hillary Clinton, Palin is a polarizing figure who motivates her critics as well as supporters.  There isn’t anything remotely “populist” in the Palin playbook which just looks like more of the same old post-Reagan strategy of giving ’em tax cuts, be vague as hel about your true agenda,  and stay folksy.   You’ll have them eating out of your hand like David Broder.

Sarah Palin is not Ronald Reagan with breasts.  While the Palinistas insist she is his true spiritual heir,  there are other conservatives who give that idea two big thumbs down.

Liberals have built Palin into Queen Kong.  Can she draw a crowd?  Yep.  Can she fire up the base?  You betcha.   Does she have a brilliant political mind and an underrated command of details which enable her to articulate the issues clearly, concisely and coherently?   Get real.

Palin is not Ronald Reagan redux.   She’s as scary to liberals as Reagan was comforting to conservatives, but it’s a disservice to Reagan to compare her meager abilities to his almost legendary skills.   Could Obama turn out to be one term and done as president?  Sure he could.    Maybe Palin will be the one  to send him back to sweet home Chicago, but she will have to do more than she’s done so far to show she’s ready to sit in the big chair.  She had one in Alaska and didn’t find it comfortable.  If Obama bombs out, voters may want a safe, old White guy with gray in his hair to replace him instead of yet another minimally experienced Chief Executive.

The mistake not to make here is to ridicule Palin so much that she becomes an object of sympathy or to inflate her as a Wonder Woman with mythical powers at her command.   She’s only a politician.   Maybe different  from other demagogues and single-issue candidates that predate her emergence, but in many other ways, Palin is quite similar.

Her strength perches upon President Obama’s perceived weakness.   There are scenarios in play that lead Palin to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.   But Palin wouldn’t go into an head-to-head throwdown with Obama unblemished.   There’s plenty of unfinished business about how Palin performed as governor of Alaska and the fact she quit in her first term to cash in on her stardom is a bitter pill for even conservatives that like her to choke down.   Quitters make lousy leaders, mostly because you  never know when they’re going to up and quit again.

Look, its obvious Palin wants to be president. I got no problem with that. I still don’t believe she has the right stuff to go all the way through a presidential campaign and the reason she seems like such hot stuff now is because compared to Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee she’s a freaking superstar.

Right now though, people spend more time talking about what she’s writing on her hand instead of what is coming out of her mouth. Can anyone say what Sarah Palin would do to stimulate the economy? Or how to handle Iran’s nuclear weapons ambitions? How would Palin put Americans back to work?

Nobody can answer those questions for me because NOBODY KNOWS. Palin has said and done nothing to lead anyone to believe she has even thought about the problems of the country. I don’t think anyone–liberal, conservative or otherwise–should be making noises about wanting to be the leader of this country without giving some serious thought as to how and where they want to lead it.

Is Palin really a racist with xenophobic and anti-government sentiments?  Perhaps not, but she is comfortable hanging with those who clearly are.   The Tea Party as a whole is not racist, but there are plenty of racists who feel at home in The Tea Party and nobody seems to be terribly troubled within the movement to get rid of them.  Palin certainly has shown no sign to she wants to distance herself from the racists, anti-immigrant nativists, Birthers, 9/11 Truthers and other fringe types hanging around the Tea Party.  As long as they do Palin looks like the candidate of the Angry White Man.  That’s a formidable voting bloc, but is a winning one?

As time goes by, I find myself almost hoping Palin does run for president. The biggest threat to Obama doesn’t come from the extremists like Palin, Cheney and Limbaugh. It’s the smooth operators like a Tim Pawlenty, Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee who are quietly going about their business and flying under the radar while Palin grabs the headlines.  They know the danger that lies in peaking too soon.

Palin’s act won’t wear well over nearly a two-year presidential campaign. She serves up plenty of red meat for the Palinistas and Tina Fey to gorge on, but there’s a limit to how much of  the “folksy, soccer mom” shtick voters will put up with when they are out of work, afraid of losing their homes, and scared about their future.  That’s when they will demand solid answers and not vague homilies to motherhood, God and country.

What Palin and the Tea Party want to bring about is a hard right turn back to the Reagan Era, but I’m unconvinced that is where America wants to go.  More tax cuts for the wealthy, less oversight over the banks, maintaining the status quo on healthcare and more wars are not the type of policies anyone but neocons and Republicans want to pursue.

Reagan to Palin: Less in common than you might think.

By tying the fortunes of the Tea Party to her own, Palin is betting she can use their anger to fuel her brand of right-wing populism to propel her right over her Republican competitors and then Barack Obama.  I have serious doubts that the politics of resentment are going to be enough.   George Wallace, Ross Perot and other candidates from the fringes of the political Left and Right have tried to parlay White resentment, frustration and fear all the way into the Oval Office.

The seeds of Sarah Palin’s defeat rest within the character of Sarah Palin.  Her narcissistic need to be the center of attention, her exaggerated sense of achievement and her abilities, and her expectation that everything she does will be met with acclaim and adulation no matter how reckless, baffling or foolhardy the action is.  Palin takes no responsibility for anything, never takes ownership for her own errors but always finds a handy scapegoat (the press, liberals, disloyal staffers) and occupies a fantasy world obsessed with wealth, power and success—her success.

Sarah Palin does not feel your pain.  She only wants your vote and unconditional love.  But she’s no Reagan or Wonder Woman.  She’s the media darling of the moment.  Just like Barack Obama was once.   Then he got elected and suddenly he wasn’t .